Reflections on Diagnosis, Creativity, and Identity
Between 2006 and 2008, I attended a hospital treatment centre daily for eighteen months, where I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder (emotionally unstable personality disorder), alongside traits of Asperger’s syndrome and obsessive-compulsive disorder. Coming to terms with these diagnoses was gradual but clarified many of the chaotic patterns in my life.
With over forty years as a photographer, including twenty in the commercial world running my own business, I began using photography a decade ago to process and express my experiences. Exploring themes like ‘Others’, ‘Ego’, ‘Alienation’, and ‘Neglect’ allowed me to understand my mental health and childhood; creativity became a therapeutic outlet.
For the last ten years, I’ve worked as a Lived Experience Practitioner, delivering ‘Personality Disorder’ training in mental health services while continuing my self-exploration through photography. Balancing these roles has been both liberating and enlightening.
The label ‘Personality Disorder’ is increasingly seen as stigmatising and contentious, with alternatives like ‘Complex Needs’ and ‘Trauma Informed’ being considered, though all mental health labels carry stigma.
Although I face challenges, so does everyone. I do not see myself as ‘disordered’; many difficulties stem from exclusive societal systems. The idea of ‘normal’ seems less relevant, given our shared and unique experiences and neurodiversity.
My book shares this journey, exploring the relationship between diagnosis, identity, creativity, and society’s attitudes. It features poetry, song lyrics, and quotes with personal meaning that give context to my thinking process and the images.
The book is 20x20cm, 112 pages, with 42 images, organised into categories like my website. Price: £20 + £6.00 postage, £11.50 if tracking required, within the UK. Each copy is personally signed and can be ordered by contacting me through my website’s contact page.
Below is a brief flavour of what the book has to offer.
Above is the front cover of the book.
Image Title: Christo and Jeanne-Claude meet Marcel Duchamp. An imaginary collaboration between the artists.
Page 1 below. The quote by Monet, is a great description of how I approach my work today.
Pages 2 & 3, Forward, below.
“A personal narrative about the intersection between mental health and creativity.”
“The book is more than just a collection of images; it is a testament to the power of art in the healing process and an inspiring story of finding one’s unique voice through creativity.”
Mark Cockerton Dip.AD SAID.
Pages 4 & 5, The Man, below.
The two spreads below are an example of how the page categories and images appear throughout the book. The particular section below is for ‘ArtCity’, has song lyrics on the left hand page 12 and the section introduction on the right hand page 13.
Below, page 14 has the image title and narrative and page 15 has the first image of this particular category.
The following categories ‘Street’, ’Others’, ‘Ego’, ‘Alienation’, ‘Neglect’, and ‘Clouds’, follow the same design and style.
Below is the back cover.
Image Title, Other Self also known as the Jezebel Spirit.
The title refers both to the idea of being possessed as well as having multiple personalities as I’ve often felt I have, but in truth we are all multi faceted and maybe the key is whether these facets are integrated or not?
As well as linking to a favourite song of mine about possession, the Jezebel Spirit from the album, My Life in the Bush of Ghosts, by David Byrne and Brian Eno
